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Getting tired of the Mistress blah blah blah scamsters
Posted:Jul 13, 2018 8:59 am
Last Updated:Jul 13, 2018 9:41 am

Good grief! There isn't a day that goes by on this site without multiple incoming messages similar to the following, and this is the only type of message I ever seem to get. WTF!

"edujhdrt634: hello..?Are you looking for delicious PUSSY.? Sexpartner? and want to meet in person. are you interested to be a sub guy..and to have a Mistress like me to worship my delicious pussy? hit me if you interested..? Message me on my email mistresschantelle08 at google mail dot com. And so that i can send you some of my pics."

I gotta get off this site, but I keep holding out hope I'm going to finally hook up with somebody on here. Dumb!
Lame-ass dysfunctional conversations
Posted:Jul 12, 2018 5:14 pm
Last Updated:Jul 15, 2018 10:18 pm

Well, as every guy has experienced on here, successful chats are typically about as successful as failure to start chat. The results are always the same: abysmal failures. Consider this lame conversation I just had: Names and places have been changed to protect the innocent, or guilty, or who the fuck knows.

Me: Hi 3:33 PM

Me: Tried several times to chat with you. Not sure if chat is not working or you are just ignoring. 3:34 PM

Me: Guess you are just ignoring me? 3:39 PM

Me: This is why it is so hard to take this site seriously. The women almost never respond. 3:44 PM

Her: Why do you say that? 3:45 PM

Me: I've tried to chat with you for several days with no reponse. 3:45 PM

Her: Sorry. I didn't mean to offend you. I am Karen. 3:49 PM

Me: You didn't offend me. It's just that you never responded. I know the women on here get many more messages than the guys, but it gets very frustrating. 3:50 PM

Her: I am sorry. What's your name? 3:51 PM

Me: I'm Paul. 3:52 PM

Me: I'm in XXXXX. 3:52 PM

Her: Nice to meet you paul. 3:52 PM

Her: I am in XXXXX 3:52 PM

Me: Nice to meet you too, Karen. Yes, I saw you were in XXXX. That's why I tried to chat. I'm looking for a female friend close by. 3:53 PM

Her: Are you married? Picture? 3:54 PM

Me: Yes, married. You? 3:54 PM

Me: I have pic on profile, but not face. 3:55 PM

Her: I cant get to the profile unless I sign up 3:56 PM

Her: Yes married 3:56 PM

Me: I am a standard member like you, but I can still see part of your profile. I just hover my mouse over your blank picture. 3:59 PM

Her: I am on my phone 3:59 PM

Me: Oh, it's harder to see partial profiles on phone. Better to use computer, I think. 4:00 PM

Me: You don't have any picture though, just a blank. 4:00 PM

Her: No I have to be discreet 4:02 PM

Her: I can exchange photos but I want to see you too 4:02 PM

Me: Well, I do too. However, I can host for the right person. Are you interested to meet for coffee or something? 4:03 PM

Her: Of course 4:03 PM

Me: Ok, are you around during the day at all? 4:04 PM

Me: Not sure if there is a delay in chat? 4:08 PM

Her: I am answering all my messages 4:09 PM

Me: Are you getting a lot? 4:10 PM

Her: Yes 4:11 PM

Me: Well, if you want to set up a meet, please let me know when is good for you. 4:13 PM

Her: Ok 4:15 PM

Me: Well, if you are not interested to set up something now, I guess I'm going to go. 4:20 PM

Her: Ok 4:21 PM

By the way: This is the portion of text from her profile that I can see as a standard member. It sure sounds like she is serious, right?

"I want to have clean, mutually satisfying fun. Oral sex is my favorite. I have been told I have an amazing tongue. Let's..."

So what is the consensus here folks?
She's not interested. Move on
She's always going to be bombarded with too many messages. You are doomed to failure. Move on.
Try again. Maybe next time will be different.
She's a hired fluffer and of course has no intention of meeting.
13 Comments , 16 votes
Is 61 too old for hard, deep fucking?
Posted:Jul 7, 2018 11:52 am
Last Updated:Jul 15, 2018 10:36 pm

Ok, so this is kind of a corollary to my previous poll question. So, the woman I was chatting with was 27 and I'm 61. I realize this is new information that could have affected the voting, but hey! I'm not a perfect pollster. Also, I'm married, and as one female blogger noted on some other blog, a woman likes to go into a relationship with as few restrictions as possible on the future possibilities. I'm bringing all this up because I've been on this site for quite a while now and I'm a bit mystified why I haven't been able to get ANYTHING going. I've selected some poll responses based on my fears and suspicions. Also, I've created an "Other" category which you could select and then also post your comment.
61? Ew! That's disgusting old man!
Married? Ew! You are a horrible person for being here!
27 is way too young for you. You should only contact people your own age.
61 and married is ok. Keep trying. The 1 millionth chat could be the charm.
13 Comments , 20 votes
Is 22 miles too far to go for hard, deep fucking?
Posted:Jul 6, 2018 6:46 pm
Last Updated:Jul 15, 2018 10:17 pm

So I'm chatting with somebody today and she says she wants some hard, deep fucking. I told her I did too! And, I offered to host at my place. So she asked me my location, which is 22 miles from her location, to which she replied "Kinda far." Then the chat "Kinda died."

Really? What does anybody else think?
Yes, 22 miles is too far to drive for hard, deep fucking.
No, 22 miles is not too far to drive for hard, deep fucking.
You've been blown off. Move on.
The whole conversation was a fake with a hired "fluffer."
28 Comments , 102 votes
Damn! Sunburn!
Posted:Jul 6, 2018 7:56 am
Last Updated:Jul 7, 2018 7:31 am

Dammit! Got a little sunburn yesterday in my quest for naked nooky on the beach. I eschewed sunscreen (except on the family jewels) but was only out from under the umbrella for about 10 minutes! Let that be a lesson and a warning to others.
A day at the beach
Posted:Jul 5, 2018 5:24 pm
Last Updated:Jul 12, 2018 5:58 pm

So, faced with another day just like any other day here on AdultFriendFinder, which is to say, a whole lotta nada, I decided to take my sexual obsession on the road to blacks beach. About 10:30, I packed my things and headed out. Emblematic of my delusional thinking, I even brought condoms in case my search for the illusive naked female within touching distance morphed into some kind of full "blown" action!

11:52 . I arrived and descended to the beach from the gliderport, and was in position just north of the volleyball nets and buck-naked. It was pleasant feeling the cool ocean breeze flowing seductively across my fresh-shaved cock and balls. My skin was so white against the light-brown sand that I was probably visible as a bright shiny spot from space.

Nobody around but some fat guy about 100 feet away.

11:59. A nice looking woman stops about 50 feet in front of me. I am thinking "pay dirt!" but no, she is just taking her shoes off to continue walking barefoot.

12:05. I spray some aerosol suntan lotion on my cock and balls to ward off any chance of sunburn in the nether regions. Ouch! The main ingredient is denatured alcohol and it stings like hell on my balls! Won't be doing that again! Back to lotion next time, even though it looks like playing with myself while putting it on (ok, maybe I am, just a little.)

12:13. A super-white guy with blond hair walks by along the shore. His skin has the telltale hue of someone who's going to be in a lot of pain later. Lobster anybody?

12:32. A naked woman bends all the way over with her back facing me to rub some lotion on her lower legs. Too bad she's 400 feet away or I'd have an awesome view.

12:36. Some guy walks back by the base of the cliff nearby and waters the bushes. Thankfully the wind is blowing parallel, so no overspray!

1:04. Damn! Too many guys moving in around here. No naked women within 400 feet. Looks like a major bad choice on my part hitching my wagon to this location. Another guy walks back to pee behind me.

1:13. There goes guy number 3 for a pee! And damn, that woman 400 feet away that was spreading lotion on her naked body a while ago is now doing some erotic yoga moves. What am I doing over here? Meanwhile, several more guys are headed in this direction and no there's no other visible women.

1:19. Now I have to pee! I discretely relieve myself in a bottle while sitting, but it's a little tough doing the "shake and dance" to get the last few drops out. Baby wipe to the rescue (I actually brought those along in case of a need for some other kind of cleanup. Dream on delusional buddy!)

1:28. A MF couple sets up camp about 100 feet in front of me. She takes off her shirt and bra and it looks like she has some kind of narrow tatoo strip running down the center of her back. She keeps her thong bottom on but makes for very nice viewing as she bends to lotion her legs. He does her back.

1:37. A woman shows up 50 feet to the right of me, but for crying out loud! She's putting up a tent!

1:57. Tent lady steps outside for a moment talking on the phone and wearing a black bikini. But then, when I look back, she has no bottom on. Nice! She ducks back into her tent.

2:00. outa here. A day at the beach is shaping up like a day on AdultFriendFinder. I can get this kind of action without leaving home.
Dreams of a different ending
Posted:Jul 2, 2018 8:22 am
Last Updated:Jul 3, 2018 9:42 am

So, one day several years ago I took a trip down to blacks beach for the afternoon. I love getting naked on that beach and of course the girl watching is awesome. Anyway, that particular day I was laying by the volleyball area when a naked woman with a nice body walked up and sat on her towel near me. She leaned back and arched her back slightly and I made no attempt at all to conceal my pleasure looking at her tits. As I was enjoying the view she turned her head and looked right into my eyes. I looked back into her eyes for several moments then slowly took in her whole body and returned to look into her eyes again. I wanted her to see that I was staring at her and taking sexual pleasure in the view without any concern at all what she thought.

As I continued to looked into her eyes and enjoy her naked body, she lowered her leg closest to me and then turned to face me with her legs spread open. Again I took in her whole body, making sure she could see my eyes enjoying her tits and then slowly dropping to enjoy her naked pussy and thighs. She was shaved completely naked and her pussy lips were spread open slightly. She obviously enjoyed me looking at her.

She continued to turn so that she was on her stomach with her back arched up and her tits dropping down below her. She stayed in this position for some time and watched me as I enjoyed her tits and slowly took in her legs and the curve of her ass, then she laid down with her head turned toward me and watched me. At this point I stood up to shake out my towel with my back facing her, then I bent down to lay out the towel. I then knelt on the edge of the towel with my legs apart and I reached out to smooth out the edges of the towel. I made sure of my position so she could see my cock, balls and asshole pointed directly toward her. Then I layed back down and turned my head toward her. We continued like this for quite a while, closing our eyes to relax and enjoy the sun, then occasionally opening eyes to look at each other. After some time, she turned onto her side with her back facing toward me and her upper leg slightly turned so that her ass was spread open, and she spent some time smoothing out her towel. She clearly wanted me to enjoy the view of her shaved asshole and pussy lips. She had light color hair, and her asshole was a beautiful light brown that contrasted deliciously with her tanned butt.

Right about this time a guy quickly ran up to her with a Frisbee and said something. I had noticed this guy checking out the situation for some time, and it was clear he felt he had to act before he lost the moment. She got up and obliged the guy by playing Frisbee with him. What an awesome view it was watching her body in motion from all sorts of different angles.

I don't remember any more details of that particular day, and at some point I left, but I was to have another encounter with this woman soon after which I will describe in a later post.

Posted:Jun 30, 2018 1:49 pm
Last Updated:Jul 12, 2018 5:22 pm

About : San Diego resident. Fit, trim, easygoing, non-smoking and DD free older guy. While, I don't have a 20 year old body I am in great shape for my age. I like to get outdoors and in nature, and San Diego is great for that.

I've been a one-woman man but looking for a change for just sex and fun. Prefer an ongoing discrete, DD free friend. Available during the day most days and can host. Also available some evenings.

Anything else, just ask: same profile name on y.

Other Profile Information:

Sexual Orientation: Straight
Looking For: Women
Marital Status: Married but looking for discrete sex
H: 6 ft 1 in
Body Type: Slender
Smoker: Non Smoker
Drinking: A Light/Social Drinker
Education: BS
Occupation: Engineering
Race: Caucasian
Religion: None
Have Children: No
Want Children: No
Speaks: English
Hair Color: Gray
Hair Length: Very Short
Glasses or Contacts: Yes
Eye Color: Hazel
Astrology: Gemini
Personality Type: Gemini

My Ideal Person: Discrete, DD free. Non smoker. Good hygiene. Various body types ok but must be reasonably fit. As for the rest, if we meet and click then aren't we lucky!
1 comment

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Most Recent Comments by Others

Post Poster Post Date
Lame-ass dysfunctional conversations (24)CurvyLadyTN
Jul 15, 2018 2:00 pm
Is 22 miles too far to go for hard, deep fucking? (49)CurvyLadyTN
Jul 15, 2018 1:49 pm
Is 61 too old for hard, deep fucking? (19)Yoursideguy76
Jul 7, 2018 8:01 pm